We become the creators of our lives, instead of its victims, when we can watch our lives unfolding negatively or positively, and have complete equanimity and respect for each moment in our hearts. The moment you decide you aren't enough, you are not enough. So, bow and accept this: you are worthy, you are worthy, you are worthy.
Every step of this journey IS the journey. Don't wish it all away. Prioritize your joy. Make it messy, make it colorful, and enjoy every step of this masterpiece you're creating. Our matter is infinite, but life energy is fleeting. Surrender.